My notifications aren't working on Words with Friends. Used to work...
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My notifications aren't working on Words with Friends. Used to work...
They never give me enough sauce when I order out.
My daughter cracked her clarinet so she'll have to get 3 grand out of her savings and get another.
Think I ate too much for dinner.
Being called a homophobic because I don't want to be ****d in prison.
My car is having some things done to it today so I road my bike to work since the weather is perfect... I was not able to use my favorite lunch box because it doesn't fit in my bike basket
The following users like this post: McRib
My eyebrows are pink from my lunch wax :-/
The following users like this post: DRminimega67
I finally watched almost everything I had backlogged on my DVR this week since I had the flu for the second time in a month...
The following users like this post: McRib
When you have to shake the vending machine to make the damn candy bar fall.
I was too lazy to pull out last night.
3 users like heff's post: Aurora, McRib, suncoastsooner
my toes are cold
The confusion caused by accidentally hitting the number lock on my keyboard resulted in 5 seconds of pure misery.
Can't ever open the box of cereal without ****ing it up.
2 users like NAMLOOT's post: Aurora, oorah_okie
Hulk smash?Originally Posted by NAMLOOT
I sharted
My phone died while I was at a baby shower and I missed a cute picture
The following users like this post: McRib
My ankles kept getting hit by Americans on rascals while at Disney.
The following users like this post: Aurora
I burned my lip on ramen, it blistered and pealed
The following users like this post: Aurora
While trying to get situated in my Comfy chair recliner I spillt milk from my bowl into the chair
Based on the vip thread this is the least of your problems
The following users like this post: CookiePuss
Zack and Miri Make a ****o is on!!
But I'm too dozey to watch
The following users like this post: Aurora
My television is too big to legally watch the Super Bowl.
2 users like drumhead23us's post: IndySooner, soonerintn
.
Waiting for the gate to my girlfriends neighborhood to open.
For five hours.
2 users like oucub23's post: IndySooner, oorah_okie
And finally being run off by the neighborhood security guard.
Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk HD
3 users like xunil's post: IndySooner, oorah_okie, oucub23
Wahine had to be admitted to the hospital with pneumonia and severe vomiting for three days...
Instead of the normal $5 copay, the hospital admission will cost me $10...
and ****d on the way home and stained the car seat, same as the last 14 nights
2 users like willie's post: IndySooner, oorah_okie
Out of milk, got to use water to make my oatmeal.
Helluvaman would tell her to walk it off
I'd like to post a gif on a thread and get a bunch of likes, but the page is 6 posts away from a new page, so I have to wait, because I hate posting at the very bottom of the page.
.
It's opened by a code bruh.
Never happened doe
Ok, this might be true
The water wasn't hot enough when I got a pedicure.
now it's worse with a big white blister
The lady singing the national anthem at my President's inauguration had to lip sync it because she was cold.
Can't watch the Super Bowl because the lights went out.
Outside grilling and one of my outdoor speakers around the pool stopped working...
Helped cook for a big Super Bowl party. We had a bunch of Thai shrimp left over and it won't taste as good reheated.
2 users like DIB's post: McRib, SoCaliSooner
dog had to **** with 4 minutes left in the superbowl so had to pause it on the dvr and come back to watch the end.
The heater/AC in my work truck works too well. So either sweat from the heater, freeze from the AC, or have it on lukewarm, which fogs up the windows.
The $400,000 robotic arm on my subsea robot was pissing me the **** off this morning....but I laughed last...and won!
The following users like this post: Aurora
My daughter is worried that another girl will have the same color dress at her prom.
I hate that when that happens.
I cant figure out what is appropriate to tip at a restaurant. 15 or 20 %.
If you're a minister or an atheist... -0-
2 users like soonerbornsoonerbret's post: Aurora, Sooner 4 Life
I wore inappropriate shoes for a 13 hour work day.
I ate too much.
Damn toilet paper is on backward.
I'm not sure I like my new 55" tv
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