Ehh its all politics
What about brides? I'd hate for some of you to die alone.
there are plenty of kids in orphanages here if people want to adopt...
In before Dome
seems like a dick move but but there are enough u.s. kids need adopting
The US system is way too CYA focused IMO. The government would rather bounce kids from foster home to foster home than take the risk of having to answer for why they placed them in what seemed like a loving home but turned out not to be. Same politics that are causing thousands of Russian children to be warehoused are also causing American children to be warehoused.
My wife and I adopted our daughter from Korea five years ago and the process was long, difficult, expensive and well worth it. The agency was a private Christian based group so they operated within the boundaries of what was required but with some common sense and reason. They focused more on the family after she was placed than they did on us before, which is just how it should be. They also use lots of people who have been through the process to assist families going through the process which makes it much easier for everyone.
Fact is it is easier to adopt from other countries than it is from the US.
If we (US) have anything like that, it's news to me. I suppose the closest structure you could call an orphanage is a group home, but the vast majority of those kids aren't orphans.
Like I said...
Last edited by soonerintn; July 20th, 2013 at 01:34 AM.
I know a couple that adopted a Russian kid. They went through hell and back to get it done, took like two years. They rejected a couple of kids because of fetal alcohol syndrome. I don't know why they picked a russian kid. Seems like you can get a kid cheap these days on the black market.
Anyway, I'm never adopting a Russian kid, or any other kid for that matter, so what do I care if they don;t let us do it any more? Why is this a big deal?
A very large number (like maybe 85%) of Russian children are adopted by American families. The problem is, Russian orphanages, as well as some or all of the Eastern Blocs, have little oversight or rules regarding their orphanages, from what I understand. These are the children like I said above who spend most of their time alone in cribs, and these orphanages are breeding grounds for reactive attachment disorder. I think Soonerintn said he knew a woman who sent her child back to Russia because she was afraid of him - I have heard that story many many times. Reactive attachment disorder is extremely troubling and very scary. If you have no attachments, you can basically have no conscience, and not care for other people's physical or emotional well-being. Children in these orphanages have no one there to attach to, sometimes they don't learn to speak or even potty train at appropriate times, and sometimes are not even sure what their names are.
The families i have known and worked with chose Eastern European adoptions because the children are Caucasian, and although many families adopt incredibly gorgeous children from Asian or Africa, some just want their kids to resemble them (which of course is understandable).
Disclaimer: There may be people on the board who have actually tried to or adopted from Russia with different experiences, and I know some go well with no problems. I usually only hear the troubled placements.
a) russian children may not have the opportunity for a better life as a result...
b) the ruskies did this as petty retaliation for complaining about their human rights violations....
They've been steadily in decline and families have had to wait longer and longer. The stoppage will halt some of them in their tracks, and possibly even strand some families. We're not talking huge numbers - but every number is a child with hopefully a better life now.
Adoptions from Russia to U.S. by year
I'll find & post an article on The Hague that might help.
I read somewhere that almost all the Russian mafia guys have heads that are flat on the back. It's a result of not being picked up and being left to sit in a crib all day. It's easy to do the mafia stuff if you have no conscience.
I was adopted in 1965 at the age of 3 mo. Not from another country mind you. I know that it took my parents several years to adopt. For the three months prior to adoption I apparently was in some sort of foster care, luckily for me I ended up in a very loving home, never wanted for anything. I know very little about my birth mother/father, I did fully and emotionally attatch to my adoptive parents, however as an infant I never cried, which worried my mother. I did seem to laugh and try to talk/babble all the time.
Between around 1850-1930, the US had Orphan Trains, where homeless, orphaned, or abandoned children would be loaded up and shipped across the country. Families would meet them at the different depots and pick the kids they wanted, usually based on looks or size (many became farm hands) and many separated from their brothers and sisters in the process. The families didnt really have to meet any requirements. The grandpa of one of my friends was adopted from the Orphan Trains at the age of 5. He was lucky an had a good home, his 3yo sister wasn't as lucky.
Then we started getting laws that governed adoption and protected children (child protection laws came after animal welfare laws), but there were places like homes for unwed mothers and such a stigma attached to single motherhood that it was fairly simple for a couple to adopt an infant or newborn (although lack of technology made it cumbersome).
In the last 20 years, child protection laws have really increased because oversight and a better understanding of parental attachments and trauma and permanency (or lack thereof) an the impact on child growth and development. It's much more socially acceptable to be a single parent, so the majority of unwed mothers keep their children. Adoption has become a more normative way of parenting, so we have a large number of families seeking adoptive children.
I kinda went off the rails there a lil bit, sorry. Just to say if you were in a family setting, seems like you received the proper responses to your needs, you turned out fine
I was one of the luckiest kids I know, I had such good parenting, any shortcomings I have are my own doing, I have met alot of adopted kids and not all have been as blessed as I have. Luckily because of when I was born I ended up in the best of situations. I have 4 kids of my own now and the last two were a long time coming, if we had not been able to concieve, we were going to try to adopt via Korea/ China of possibly Africa.....I still want to but my wife says we have our hands full enough, she is probably right....